You’re an idiot. I can’t believe you screwed up again. Are you ever going to get it right? When are you going to get your head out of your @!&*# and back in the game? You’ve screwed up too many times. How embarrassing! You’ll be lucky to keep your job.
The bullying has got to stop! We get upset and downright angry when we hear this type of belittling going. And rightfully so.
But what happens when the person doing the ranting is YOU? And, you are the person getting the brunt of it is also YOU?
Sadly it happens all the time. Sometimes after a missed play, during a slump, after a loss or when you are sitting on the injured list. You might be asking, “What’s the big deal? I’m just releasing steam. Everybody has negative trash talk in their heads, don’t they?”
Here Are The Facts:
* Yes, everyone has these negative voices chattering away, especially when you are under pressure. Your brain is set up for survival. That’s its number one job. So if you are about to take a risk, do something daring or you just feel pressured – these thoughts automatically kick in to keep you stifled, stagnant, safe. Or so they think.
* Left unmanaged, these thoughts will take you down. They come from a part of your brain that overrides all other parts. And they will show up at your most important moments, when you feel pressured. Negative thoughts can swiftly wipe out your skills, talents, intelligence and your career. They don’t play favorites. They don’t care if it’s the ‘big’ game or your contract year. Never mind if the scouts are in the stands and this is your big chance. Everyone is fair game.
* You can’t ‘will’ them away. It might work for a time or two. You try to push the thoughts down or ignore them. But guess what? They will be right back when you least expect them or want them to show up. And this is even more frustrating and distracting then ever – right?
The Good News:
* You can manage these thoughts, negative voices, in the moment.
First, identify what sets you off. Your stressors. You know what they are. They’re the people, places, events or things that upset you routinely.
* Then strategically preplan how to quickly and easily wipe them out … even under extreme pressure. You focus on what’s important and block out all the rest.
* It takes a willingness to change. To know that the upside is you and your head stay in the game moment to moment. One error doesn’t not get magnified and become more errors. You remain in charge of your thoughts, even under extreme pressure, because you have predetermined your response.
If you wouldn’t say it to family or friends, what makes you think it’s OK to say this type of negative stuff to yourself? If your goal is to take you, your performance and your career down the toilet, then continue doing what you’re doing. If your goal is to perform consistently at the highest level . . . strategically build your predetermined plan and have the confidence that comes from knowing who’s in control – YOU are the ultimate decision maker!